Fighting procrastination that is, some things have changed for me as of recent but my inattention still hasn't. I already missed a day of school but I promise it'll be the last. I'm a little upset that I dropped my Japanese class because it really was the one I loved the most. But as much as I love the class and my teacher I just don't think that its worth it to have school 5 days a week when I spend more time on the bus than I do in class. I think it is relatively pointless. That and Nadia >.>
But on that particular topic, a while ago someone mentioned to me that "You really don't respect people in relationships do you?" That was the time I realized that I really don't, and I guess its because my first relationship my girlfriend was really open to me doing whatever, and she even encouraged me to talk to other girls (maybe I took it too far). Since my friend told me that I think I've shaped up and I actually do care now, although it is a little disheartening that I can't have everything, I think that this will end up making me a better person.
Psychology class, about communication between people; I have it with the same professor that I had last semester. Looks like he is now doing great and also teaches the same way. Regardless of the fact it is now a different class I was subject to a mind-reading, and the same stories and jokes I heard the first time around. Also the short classes continued. It is a 3 hour lecture every friday, this one ended at 1 hour. Real.
I got a call from the doctor's office finally, they called me in for a psychiatric evaluation in two months. As the nurse was giving me the details of the doctor's office she told me that I would need to bring someone close to me who knew me. Someone like a best friend or a girlfriend. I was wrestling with my own mind a little trying to decide whether or not it was a better idea to shirk my medical condition since I swore not to see Anna until I was alright again. For sake of understanding, I have two conditions; one is potentially terminal and one isn't. This evaluation is obviously not for the one that is terminal but I feel is just as important.
Either way I ended up sending a desperate text to Anna, and apparently she still cares enough to help me out. I feel like a giant ass for everything that I've done; and was convinced that space was healthy. I don't know what she's thinking any more, we've grown so far apart but maybe we can still be friends while all this goes on. I just have to work past all of this, no more complaining about being ignored or anything. It sure is hard.
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